the19thhistory: danielnadcliffe | goodnightlockseneca | adamusprime: wait how the hell is april almost over already it just started like yesterday #june might been hurt babe #that ain’t july You’ve seen the months come and go In a few hours…
xwhatserface: mel-lovable: karameruru: viremi: thelocalpaedo: TAKEEEEEEEE ONNNNNNNN MEEEEEEEE TAKE ON ME TAKEEEEEEEE MEEEEEEEE ONNNNNNNN TAKE ON ME I’LLLLLLLLL BEEEEEEEE GONEEEEEEEE IN A DAY OR TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
nataleeleoalways: bemusedlybespectacled: bamfinajumper: sirarthurconandoilies: airdotcaptain: ununpentium: seriously though america, please give benedict cumberbatch back soon sincerely, uk. never Dear UK, We’re keeping this one. How does it feel only having 4 actors now? Love, America Noooooo! Give him back, THIEVES!!!! I’M SORRY I CAN’T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF HIS...
fuckyeahgirlcrush: Mythbusters seriously needs to do an episode to see if two people could actually fit on that goddamn door without flipping it or sinking it so that we can finally put this issue to bed after fifteen years.
pickup lines for old people
old man: hey baby you better call life alert cuz i've fallen for you and i can't get up
A dramatic Shakespearean response to every...
When something bad happens: True is it that we have seen better days.
When something REALLY bad happens: O woe! O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day. Most woeful day That ever, ever I did yet behold! O day, O day, O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this.O woeful day! O woeful day!
When people say that something is wrong because the Bible says so: The Devil can cite scripture for his purpose.
When my girlfriend abandons me for food: FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN!
When someone doesn't thank me for holding the door open for them: BLOW, BLOW, BLOW, THOU WINTER WIND! THOU ART NOT SO UNKIND AS MAN'S INGRATITUDE!
When I burn something while cooking: MY CAKE IS DOUGH!
When human stupidity frustrates me: LORD, WHAT FOOLS THESE MORTALS BE!
When someone says I'm going to hell for my sins: NYMPH, IN THY ORISONS BE ALL MY SINS REMEMBER'D.
When I'm broke: My pride fell with my fortunes
When someone turns the light on after a period of darkness and blinding light ensues: OH, SHE DOTH TEACH THE TORCHES TO BURN BRIGHT!
When someone disagrees with me: THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN HEAVEN AND EARTH, HORATIO, THEN ARE DREAMT OF IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY.
When I argue with my girlfriend: The course of true love never did run smooth.
When I'm embarrassed: MUST I HOLD A CANDLE TO MY SHAMES?!
Someone says "Good Night": Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.
vondell-swain: classof1969: i have thought...
cameralinz: yourfandomsucks: Does it ever make you guys cry fandom tears that most of these sweet, adorable story lines and wise words that we watch the characters act out all come from our fuck up, alcoholic, oversensitive “asshole” lost boy showrunner and that these feels are his feels and this completely flawed man is teaching us a little more about being human and loving people week after...
It’s this little sponge bug and he’s got chocolate square shorts and he lives at...– Noel Gallagher on Spongebob (via gallagherwordsofwisdom) <3